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Darling and Prickly Buds of May…

The May Day Bank Holiday has been and gone – and the rain didn’t dampen the celebrations that mark the opening of the beach clubs – and the summer season is with us once again.

I have always liked May as a month as it starts with a public holiday, which is always a wise move in my book. May 1 is International Workers Day, celebrated all over the world – though as a freelance writer and broadcaster for the past 30 years I obviously have a very loose concept of the word ‘work’.

My career, such as it is, has mainly consisted of being somewhere near the right place at roughly the right time, especially if there is the chance of finding something – or even better someone – light and bubbly at the bar. I got a reputation for being the first responder to any event that was going in the 90s and noughties. When a friend’s organic ice cream company announced that it was giving away free samples, I made a beeline to the location. Ice cream was being freely distributed from the back of a refrigerated lorry with its doors open, a scenario that caused one of my best mates, who has seen me in action at hundreds of events over the years to cry out

“I don’t believe it. You’ve finally turned up to the opening of a fridge door!”

May is, however, the month where residents all take a deep breath before plunging into the madness of summer. With airlines and hotels reporting even more demand than last year, which was a record breaker, summer 2017 is set to go down as the biggest on record. All the restaurant, bar and club owners that I’ve spoken to in the past couple of weeks mention 2017 in the foreboding terms usually heard in Godzilla movies – “I can feel it coming….it’s going to be huge….it’s going to smash Marbella”.

Luckily I have the option of retreating to the Casita during the summer months to lay low. The Casita is off grid, which means I have a huge deposit tank for water and a generator for power and am able to stock up with enough food to withstand the faked tanned zombie apocalypse that can be Marbella during summer.

Although life still has its hazards. My house guest (four weeks in and counting) came with her cat, which managed to get stuck up one of my large cacti. Being the manly type that I am, I attempted to rescue the marooned moggie, made a misstep and went flying headfirst into the surrounding cacti.

The cat came down of its own accord minutes later, and as I lay pin cushioned in the shrubbery, I reflected that I might have accidently discovered a new alternative medicine.
Cacti acupuncture anyone???

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